‘I hate to walk around looking like John Wayne’

Paul Seviour (far right) reveals why the wrong sort of loo roll doesn’t make his day

“I have never been overly brand conscious and I certainly am not the kind of person to get sucked in by clever and deeply biased television marketing, but I do believe that buying premium brand toilet roll is extremely important. It has nothing to do with cute little puppies on TV running around tearing the place up with tissue, neither has it to do with the gimmicks that the mainstream companies come up with, such as luxurious quilted tissues, or all the lovely different colours you can buy them in so that they match the colour of your bathroom wallpaper, or all the different scented ones (although I do like those tissues that are kind to your nose because they’re soaked in albas oil).

“As well as improving your quality of life premium-branded toilet paper and tissue products will almost certainly earn you kudos from any of your guests who use your bathroom.”

Buying premium brand tissue instead of non-premium brand tissue is important because of the quality. I just don’t think that non-premium brand tissue has the same quality. Sometimes it feels like you’re using reconstituted sandpaper and that sort of thing can put a dampener on anyone’s day and there’s a good chance you’ll spend the next hour or so walking around like John Wayne.

I understand why this is the sort of loo roll you are likely to find in a shop or restaurant, they must go through loads of the stuff. These places are running a business and I can appreciate that they have to get the cheap stuff in. But what about the work place? You always hear about companies trying to make their staff happier. I think buying premium-branded toilet paper should be a priority for the work place too.

There are a couple of small reasons as to why it is important to afford yourself one of life’s simple comforts. You don’t need to go crazy and get the velvet lined lilac toilet roll with little flowers printed on them, just good quality premium bog roll. As well as improving your quality of life premium-branded toilet paper and tissue products will almost certainly earn you kudos from any of your guests who use your bathroom.

“Buying premium brand tissue instead of non-premium brand tissue is important because of the quality.”