Michael Jackson, professional conference presenter, and media host of Tissue World TV at the last several live Tissue World events, recently relocated with his wife Carol back to the UK after living in Africa for many years. His shopping habits have had to change completely too!
Whilst settling back into the UK on a permanent level recently after having a home base in South Africa for many years, my wife and I have had to learn and adapt to new shopping habits and products.
Familiarising ourselves with the English supermarkets was obviously a priority for us, so suitably masked and warmly dressed, we headed cheerily off to investigate the realms of Sainsbury’s, Tesco, Morrisons as well as Booths, known as the local ‘Waitrose’, a local chain in the North of England, on familiarisation missions.
Even if we were going to order in bulk as Amazon Prime customers, clearly initial ground-level research was called for!
Toilet tissue choices have grown enormously in the couple of decades that we’ve lived away from England, and of course, as expected, the massive in-house brand plethora of options (never considered as an option in the Jackson household) were all widely available, along with Andrex, Cushelle, Regina, Nicky, Kleenex and even Cheeky Panda brands, clearly on display.
Baffling, yet intriguing were the latest promised beneficial delights of all the available variations! Should we now go for 3-ply, or quilted, cushiony or extra touch (whatever that meant)? There were now bleached, unbleached, perfumed, sensitive skin variations and even bamboo options.
I almost needed to sit down and think about it all.
I’d been quite happy with a bog-standard 2-ply previously, but now, no longer! We experimented. We sampled. With a new sense of purpose, all at my wife’s insistence, we then found ourselves at loggerheads, in somewhat of a dilemma. We’d even argued over breakfast, faces becoming flushed with heated discussions…
I had come to prefer a particular Supreme Quilted version of a particular brand whilst she, who must usually be obeyed, preferred to indulge with a somewhat royal sounding brand of ‘Seriously Soft, Indulgent Toilet Tissue made from biodegradable and compostable packing’, which was also proudly forest friendly, and manufactured using only 100% green energy’.
I had unwisely interjected at that point, explaining I’d never had the need to carry a roll of toilet tissue into a forest, but was browbeaten back with a withering glance.
Mine retailed, I had even argued somewhat sensibly I thought, for nine rolls at £5.25/unit, or 36p/100sht (which had taken some careful reading).
Hers? She’d shot back with a similar, something neither here nor there price, of around 43p/unit or 43p/100sht. I was defeated at all levels and have come to discover that when it comes to quality toilet tissue, price doesn’t even enter into it in our home.
This explains why, should you visit, you’ll now find her brand in the main bathroom and mine in the guest loo. Where I’ve been delegated an official seat.